That angular jaw, those muscled biceps, those silky strands you want to run your hands through, those eyes that petrify you when he looks at you… then fate played a cruel trick and all those fantasies come crashing down on you as you’ve realized that the man you’ve been dreaming of is actually a GAY!
How frustrating it is to discover that your dream guy has the same gender preferences as you do! Well, it figures. MODERN GAYS are no longer the stereotypes that you know who are fond of joining beauty pageants. Some of them are the total opposite of what you are thinking. With this reality, it keeps getting harder to discriminate whom should you be friendly with… period, and whom should you be friendly with… and more. Sadly, there will be times when you picked the latter, realizing too late that it’s not meant to be, which is heartbreaking.
But how do you avoid being Bekizoned in the first place? The answer is simple: Identification. You need to release your Gaydar and be able to spot a gay man from a thousand paces, with or without the feather boas and sequins. Observing his behavior and mannerisms is also a good way of telling.
Watch out for the ‘sway’ and ‘flip’
A study published in the September 2013 Journal of Personality and Social Psychology shows that gay men tend to walk with a slight “sway” of the hips. A swing of the hips or a swaggered shoulder is enough for many casual observers to identify a man’s sexual orientation.
The way they flip their hair, look at their hands, or the way they hold a glass of water while drinking can also be a sign that he has crossed the other side. Watch out if a guy’s hand gestures tend to exhibit the broken wrist syndrome, especially during a conversation.
Check where his eyes go
Guys will check out other women, whether he has a girlfriend or not. It is simply a subconscious behavior that every man does throughout the day without realizing it. But did you say he has never looked at a woman? Well the next time you’re out, especially on a beach where there are a lot of men in their bare minimum, pay close attention to where his eyes are roaming. If not women, perhaps he is checking out other men? That’s a definite sign that he may be gay.
Pay attention to his hobbies and habits
Is he acting more female than you?
It’s certainly a well-known stereotype that gay males tend to be a bit more conscious about the way they look and try to look “perfect” the majority of the time. Is he just a little too ‘perfect’? Is his hair always done nicely, his face perfectly shaven, and his outfit is as fashion forward as it could possibly get with matching shoes, scarves, and all? Is he updated to the on-goings of showbiz life and constantly talks to you about it? Does he spend more time than you in the bathroom? Sure, he might just be very metrosexual and care a lot about his looks—but at least ninety percent of males aren’t like that.
So pay attention to those!
Learn more about the difference between metrosexual and heterosexual HERE.
Listen to how he talks
Listen for the way he compliments you. Does he tell you that you look beautiful in your dress or that the dress looks good on you?
You might also want to look for language which shows a lack of interest in women or an absence of language that would normally show an interest in women. Guys will generally get bashful and tongue tied around women that they like.
How does he talk about other men? Does he flirt with them? Girls may sweet talk each other. Guys don’t. They never ever do. Guys rarely compliment other guys. As often as possible, they use straight words and say what they mean, even if it comes out wrong.
Or does he frequently refer to other guys as being attractive? Does he gush about his favorite male characters on television or the latest hot-topic celebrity? Is something off about the way he talks about his favorite basketball player? Things like this can be a cue that he likes them with a little bit more than basic admiration.
Follow him on Facebook
You might as well take it to the next level to see if you’re really compatible: Stalk his Facebook account. Does he have so many profile pictures which are “selfies”? Does he have so many statuses (exam, school, love life)? Does he post topless and provocative images of him (like biting his lips and showing his tongue)? Does he have a profile picture with a girl who is not even her girlfriend?
If he’s guilty of these, you better think twice!
Observe his male friends
All guys have their own pack; a pack full of excessive testosterones. Whether he’s the alpha or the regular omegas and betas, observe how he mingles with them and any of his make friends for that matter.
Does he have a suspiciously close male friend? Have you ever noticed something weird when they’re together? Anything from lingering gazes, secret conversations, sweet touches to hugs that last longer than usual? You don’t have to be paranoid to notice those things, but there’s a famous stereotype that when you see two hot and handsome guys together, they’re probably gay… or at least one of them is.
Check out how he adorns himself
Though there’s nothing wrong with men wearing certain types of jewelries in their body, you should still need to be careful and check on how he wears them and his preferences in such. Is he wearing too much? Is he wearing too much gold? Unless he’s some datu or nobility of some far away land, the way he adorns himself could be an indicator of whether he’s gay or not.
Also, studies show that individuals who are homosexual wear thumb rings to classify their sexual orientation and relationship status. A ring placed on the left hand indicates that an individual is in a relationship, while a ring placed on the right means that they are single.
Honing your Gaydar is good and all, and you may be able to find some clues for whether or not a person is gay. But in the end, you won’t be able to know for sure unless that person opens up to you. People have different personalities, so it would be quite unfair if you make your final judgment based on these tips alone.